Tag Archives: marriage equality

That was the Gay Week That Was

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The Week of February 10, 2014 is really one for the history books. The LGBT history books, for sure.

February 10 would have also been my dad’s 84th birthday. I wonder if he would recognize this brave new world?

Red EqualsMy old home, the Commonwealth of Virginia, had its constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriage struck down this week. This comes after the new Virginia attorney general determined that he could find no legal foundation, since the Windsor decision, to support upholding the statute, outraging conservatives.

The courts also held this week that Kentucky had to recognize same-sex marriages of Kentuckians who were married in Equality States but who resided in the commonwealth. Now same-sex couples are asking that Kentucky allow same-sex marriages to happen within its borders. So, keep a weather eye out for this; still a developing story.

Also in Nevada, the Silver State’s attorney general said that his state’s constitutional same-sex marriage ban was “no longer defensible.” An about-face from a state where the constitutional restriction was put in place more than a decade ago.

Of course, this comes on the heels of recent decisions in Utah, Oklahoma and New Mexico.

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#52 from Mizzou, Michael Sam comes out. |Image: nbcnews.com

College football’s best defensive end, an odds-on favorite in the upcoming NFL draft, boldly came out this week before the draft. Michael Sam‘s decision set the entire sports world on its ear and prompted lots of conversations about gays in pro sports in places where they normally wouldn’t talk about such things. Good on him.

It also elicited this:

Dale Hansen is my new hero. Other people think so, too, which is how he got a trip here:

The magnificent Ellen Page came out at an HRC event and gave a terrific, moving and uplifting speech. Overnight, she has gone from quirky young star to just full-on awesome.

It wasn’t all good LGBT news, of course, because it seldom is, when you are fighting for what is right. The legislature in Indiana passed the first round of a same-sex marriage constitutional ban. The only good thing about this is that the earliest it could possibly go before Hoosier voters is 2016. Hopefully by that time, it will be so out-of-step with the rest of the country that it won’t go forward.

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Kansas: Trying to become the Inequality Heartland of America

And in Kansas — Oh, Kansas, moan ‘Friends of Dorothy’ everywhere — the legislature was caught up in a time-travel drama that sent their collective consciousness back to concocting Reconstruction Era policies. Some say the Kansas bill to enshrine LGBT discrimination into law under the (laughable) guise of being non-discriminatory — I know, I know — won’t pass, but I am afraid that stranger things have happened.

And there’s Sochi, and Nigeria, and, and, and ….

But, on Valentine’s Day, daytime television’s only gay supercouple, Days of our Lives‘ Will and Sonny, officially got engaged. I am fairly confident that this is a first for daytime, although some have said that Kyle and Oliver of One Life to Live were the first. I’m not sure that’s correct, but I’ll happily be proven wrong. We’ve come a long way since January 2009 when As The World Turns’ Luke and Noah, daytime’s very first gay male couple finally consummated their relationship, but were never shown in bed together! DAYS gets a gold star in my book for the way they’ve been treating these guys. Here’s a sample:

I wonder what next week will bring? An early spring? Please? Anyone?

‘Sonny’ Skies or Clouds on the Horizon? The New Normal Comes to Salem

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Who could resist this face?

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Sonny Kiriakis (Freddie Smith) proposes to a headless Will Horton (Guy Wilson) on the NBC drama Days of our Lives.

Evidently, the new incarnation of Will Horton on Days of our Lives; that’s who.

Will said “no” to Sonny — actually, he first said “Wow!” — and then explained himself and the couple ended up in the sack anyway at the end of a rather sweet scene that had a few subtle comedy bits thrown in for good measure.

The most interesting thing about this scene to me was the fact that a network television show actually showed a man proposing marriage to another man. A first for daytime; a first since the DOMA and Windsor decisions last summer; and a first not to make a distinction between same-sex and opposite sex couples. It’s a powerful step in the right direction and I have to applaud DAYS for it.

Anyone who follows this blog knows that I was no fan of how Will ended up becoming a father, but the soapy aftermath — including Freddie Smith’s bravura comedic performances delivering the baby and his beautiful monologues at Will’s bedside after he was shot — has cemented my love for this couple.

I desperately want DAYS to keep them together because they can be significant role models for gay youth; a powerful arrow in the quiver of hope for young people who believe they cannot find a solid relationship. I really don’t care if they make them a crime-fighting duo (might be fun) or have Sonny and Will take over the sketchy Kiriakis empire from Uncle Vic and do battle with a new generation of DiMeras or maybe Sonny, Will and T could roll the Brady pub into a burgeoning Salem nightspot conglomerate. Whatever. But I would like them to do it together and not fall into the old, old soap opera trope that finds only old people happy together.

When Will and Sonny began seeing each other, Sonny’s mother, Adrienne, sort of “poked the bear” in the guise of Will’s father, Lucas, telling him that the way the world was changing, who knows, they could end up as in-laws. Evidently, a lot has happened since then because Salem, according to Sonny’s proposal, is now in an Equality State. That made me laugh, I have to admit, but it’s also another gold star in DAYS’s column. Historically, soaps have been far, far behind the curve of social change — let us not forget that the very first same-sex male kiss in daytime was Luke and Noah on As The World Turns in 2007!! — so it’s nice to see a daytime serial in touch with the zeitgeist.

Read all about the episode in the fantastic (as always) blow-by-blow liveblog courtesy of “snicks” on The Backlot: Liveblogging “Days Of Our Lives” A Decent Proposal – thebacklot.com.

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Three episodes in and Guy Wilson has already been proposed to! Must be something in the water in Salem — and I don’t mean Nick Fallon!

The New Guy
I’m kinda tired of the nonsense in the comments on articles about Guy Wilson and whether or not he’s going to be as effective in assaying the character of Will Horton as two-time Emmy winner Chandler Massey.

Soap fans can be just downright nasty sometimes, forgetting that recasting is a part of life for a continuing drama. It was assumed, once upon a time, that nearly every role would be recast at some point. When there were two dozen soaps on the networks, it was always an interesting day when the announcer would say, “The role of Nola Reardon will be played today by….” It was like having a substitute teacher. The actor could be sick, but the story never stopped.

And pre-Internet spoilers when you didn’t know everything in advance, “The role of Nola Reardon will be played today by” was how you knew that it was a temporary recast. But when Dan Region intoned, “The role of Tom Hughes will now be played by”  that meant a new contract player.

What I’m saying is, suck it up, folks. Recasts happen. Guy might be the best thing that’s ever happened to this character. You don’t know. Or, he could just suck. You don’t know that either. Just give him a chance to settle into the role. Ultimately, the character is more important than the actor in the broad scheme of continuing drama.

You should just be happy that DAYS decided that the character and the couple were important enough to the landscape to invest in a new actor.

I Was An NFL Player Until I Was Fired By Two Cowards And A Bigot

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I Was An NFL Player Until I Was Fired By Two Cowards And A Bigot.

I don’t, as they say, “do football,” but this piece just solidifies my love for Chris Kluwe, one of our most vocal allies.

Teacher Fired for Obtaining Marriage License – And Other Bitchy Gripes About Bad Journalism

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Holy Ghost Preparatory Teacher Allegedly Fired For Getting Gay Marriage License: Report.

Where do I start. Okay…

1. Who in the hell writes this shit? And who in the hell edits it?
I say that mainly because of the headline above in the Huffington Post. “Gay Marriage License?” Are you for real? First of all, there is no such thing. Second of all, see “First of all.”

2. Journalism 101 Fail
Read the HuffPo article. Then ask the following questions that any decent cub journo should know to ask: Where did you apply since Pennsylvania is not an equality state? If it was in Pennsylvania, where you trying to make a political statement? Did you understand the reach of your employment contract before this event? Did you speak with your supervisors before your decided to apply for a marriage license?

For the record, it’s not just the HuffPo; the local news piece where this story originated (I guess) does not answer them either.

3. Dig a Bit
I did find my answers. In a story from UPI, of all places. UPI, the Unification Church-owned wire service which, to the best of my knowledge, is no longer held up as a standard of excellence.

They went to New Jersey for the license. And no, they didn’t seek out the school’s approval prior to getting the license which, while meaningful for the couple, won’t amount to a hill of beans in Pennsylvania.

4. Thoughts In General
Mr. Griffin, you may be a beloved teacher, but you’re a dumb ass. How naive are you to assume that a Roman Catholic Church school would embrace your same-sex marriage with open arms? Even in the interviews, you mention your employment handbook which states that behavior antithetical to Church teachings is ground for termination.

Look, I think the actions of this school — and this religious denomination for that matter — are vile and cruel and evil and ridiculous. There’s no denying that. But, sir, you knew you were dancing with the devil. You knew what Church policy was/is. You knew what the terms of your employment were. You knew those terms for the entire 12 years you were employed there. You brought this on yourself.

As someone who also lives in a state, like you do, without provisions from preventing termination for sexual orientation, I feel for you. And your partner. I really and truly do, but you knew better. And if you didn’t, well shame on you for not doing your due diligence. Until there is 100% equality for LGBT persons, that’s just a requirement for us all. You have to. Or you have to suffer the consequences.

If you want to change this for others, don’t roll over. Stand up. Be counted. Make change happen. But, if you are going to cry to the local TV and be upset that you were wronged, I don’t have any use for it. Nor do I have any use for simplistic reporting done by middle school interns.

On the other hand, if you are going to stand up and fight this, well, I’m with you 100%.

Bishop to Hold Gay Marriage ‘Exorcism’ When Gov. Signs Bill

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Ill. Catholic bishop to hold gay marriage ‘exorcism’ when governor signs bill – LGBTQ Nation.

Bishop Thomas John Paprocki, leader of the Catholic Diocese of Springfield, said marriage between gays and lesbians is a union that “comes from the devil and should be condemned as such,” reported the State Journal-Register.

Here’s the thing. Pope Francis can be all new age popey and kiss babies and pat heads and preach inclusion and what not, but until be says to church leaders that this kind of thing will not be tolerated in the Roman Catholic church, then I still have no use for him.

Hawaii Says “I Do” to Marriage Equality

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HONOLULU (AP) — Hawaii Gov. Neil Abercrombie signed a bill Wednesday legalizing gay marriage in the state that kicked off a national discussion of the issue more than two decades ago.

Now, the island chain is positioning itself for a bump in tourism as people take advantage of the new law and the state provides another example of how differently marriage is viewed in the nation.

via Hawaii Governor, Neil Abercrombie, Signs Bill Legalizing Gay Marriage In State.

I remember back in 1993 when all this “gay marriage” business started. And it started in Hawaii. It was a kickstart to a decade of slow-growth acceptance of an idea that there might one day be a place for same-sex couples to wed. In Massachusetts, the actual fact of marriage equality became a reality in 2004. Now, Hawaii will beat Illinois to the punch to become the 15th state with same-sex marriage. The dominoes keep falling.

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Aloha Oe. Waikiki Beach is a little more crowded today than in this retro image from the early 1950s, but it still will be the perfect backdrop for many island nuptials that are coming thanks to marriage equality.

Newly out in 1993, I marched on Washington for gay rights that year in what is still the largest crowd I’ve ever seen on the National Mall — and I went to plenty of rallies and two inaugurals in my nearly two decades in the national capital area — and it gave me hope for the future. I just never expected marriage.

35395753Today, I’m reminded of the late Howard Crabtree’s hysterical 1996 musical revue, When Pigs Fly, written when a “gay Hawaiian wedding” was seen as something that might have been. There’s a marvelous song in Act II called “Hawaiian Wedding Song” and it’s as downright hilarious as the rest of the show. I’m sorry Howard didn’t live to see the day. Swine are winged today in his honor!

General Motors To Offer Benefits To All Gay Married Employees

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General Motors made a groundbreaking policy change this week and announced that the company would extend marriage benefits to the spouses of same-sex employees — even if the pair lives in a state where gay marriage isn’t legal.

The only catch? The couple must have been legally married in one of the 14 (soon to be 15!) states in which gay marriage is legal.

via General Motors To Offer Benefits To All Gay Married Employees.

I don’t think that’s a catch. It’s silly to think otherwise. If you get married in Idaho and it’s not legal, why would a corporation give you benefits based on that? That’s ridiculous. It’s also ridiculous that you can’t get married in ANY state in the Union, but I digress.

Still, good on ya, GM. Almost makes me want to go buy a Chevy. Almost.

Gay Couple Legally Wed in Oklahoma Despite Statewide Ban

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Gay couple in Oklahoma legally wed despite state ban on same-sex marriage – LGBTQ Nation.
My new favorite tribe! Congratulations!

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In this photo provided by All Shots Photgraphy, the Rev. Floyd Black Bear, left, officiates the wedding of his son, Darren Black Bear, second from left, to Jason Pickel, second from right, at Fort Reno in Oklahoma. They are the third same-sex couple to be issued a marriage license from the Cheyenne and Arapaho Tribes since 2012.| Brandi Duvall AP

Despite a gay marriage ban in the Oklahoma Constitution, Darren Black Bear, 45, and Jason Pickel, 36, wed before about 50 friends and family members at the Fort Reno chapel after being granted a marriage license from the Cheyenne and Arapaho Tribes. 

John Arthur, Terminally Ill Ohio Man Who Challenged Gay Marriage Ban, Dies

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CINCINNATI (AP) — John Arthur, who with his longtime partner helped lead a legal challenge to Ohio’s ban on gay marriage, died early Tuesday, his attorney and a funeral home director said.

With Arthur terminally ill from Lou Gehrig’s disease, he and James Obergefell, both 47, flew to Maryland in June to marry. They then then sued in federal court in Cincinnati for recognition of their marriage in Ohio so they could be buried next to each other in Arthur’s family plot.

“Their love is a model for all of us,” attorney Al Gerhardstein said, praising Arthur for fighting in his last days for the rights of all same-sex couples.

via John Arthur, Terminally Ill Ohio Man Who Challenged Gay Marriage Ban, Dies.

Very sad, but a story of a triumphant outcome of hope. John Arthur continued to fight for recognition until the end. His fight may pave the way for more Ohioans to have their marriages legally recognized.

There’s a video embedded on the jump. Watch it. You’ll cry.

New Jersey Welcomes You — Or Not — We’re Unsure, Really. (Meanwhile, Enjoy our Turnpike)

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Several New Jersey towns were accepting applications for marriage licenses so gay couples can tie the knot starting Monday – unless the state Supreme Court blocks the nuptials before then.

via N.J. towns accept marriage applications, prepare for same-sex weddings – LGBTQ Nation.