Whiny ‘Children’

I read with interest a letter to fans of All My Children and One Life to Live sent by Prospect Park’s (PP) The Online Network (TOLN) on May 16 informing them that the organization planned to reconfigure their distribution methods and release two rather than four new episodes of each show per week.

Then I watched the Internet explode.

The ridiculous hue and cry that was sent up by a vocal minority of viewers was pretty stupendous. It was as if PP had asked, collectively, for everyone to reach into their chests and remove their spleens. Grow up.

Here’s what AMC’s Jill Larson (Opal Cortlandt) had to say about it on Facebook:

Everyone has done a Herculean job, truly unbelievable, the shows look wonderful, I am so very proud to be able to be a part of this daring undertaking. Our producers and writers work until 4:00AM nearly every night, I wondered how long this could continue.

The cast of the "new" All My Children includes many familiar faces, including original cast member Ray MacDonnell and longtime co-stars Cady McClain, Jill Larson, David Canary, Julia Barr and others. Image: Ferencomm/The Online Network.

The cast of the “new” All My Children includes many familiar faces, including original cast member Ray MacDonnell and longtime co-stars and fan favorites Cady McClain, Jill Larson, David Canary, Julia Barr, Eden Reigel, Debbie Morgan, Darnell Williams and others. Image: Ferencomm/The Online Network.

And while Jill notes that this is not why the number of episodes being released each week is being cut back, it’s a very important thing to contemplate. If you’ve never worked in a theatre or on a soundstage, you have no idea just how many people it takes to create the entertainment that you’re experiencing. If those technicians burn out, your production suffers. And if you don’t know a dolly grip from a focus puller and why they’re so important, when shut your yammer.

Patterns Shift
Now, what PP did note in their initial communication was that they were as surprised as anyone about how the vast majority of viewers are consuming this material. And, as a marketer, I have no doubt that they are spot on in their adjustments and why they are doing it.

What you have to realize is that buying patterns and entertainment consumption patterns shift over time. Without getting too far into the weeds with marketing geek speak, at the end of the day, if you have data on your audience and you can see how and when they are consuming your material, you have an obligation to the consumer to deliver that material in a way that is beneficial to the majority of your audience.

Quite frankly, I was surprised that TOLN planned five half-hours of material per week (four of story and one behind-the-scenes show). If I was among those with decision-making power here, I might have lobbied for a return to the original Irna Phillips playbook and 15-minute programs because (A) it is at the root of the genre and (B) because of my knowledge of peoples’ online attention spans. [damn short] Of course, I would have in all likelihood been overruled, because while a 15-minute program four times a week and two 30-minute programs per week equate to the same amount of story, the ad impressions double in the half-hour segments and if you understand anything about TV (or its equivalents) you know it’s all about the Benjamins!

The Old School Viewer Weighs In
I guess the thing that really cheeses me off are the people who are accusing PP of creating this “viewing habits paradigm” out of whole cloth to get out of providing four days of programming per week.

I’m going out on a limb here to defend some people I know ZERO about personally, and say, “Shut up, ya ignorant cows.”

And, I can attest that in my experience, PP’s Jeff Kwatinetz is correct. His explanation is exactly how people are consuming online content. Ask anyone who streamed a full season of House of Cards all at once on Netflix. Ask Arrested Development fans how they spent May 26th (ask on the 28th, they’ll be sleeping on the 27th; they were up all night long). If someone has a free hour or two during the day — every day of the week — to devote to watching entertainment programming, please let me know how to get their life.

Hell, even back in the day, the only reason I could continue to watch continuing dramas was because of the advent of the VCR. (Some of us work.) I would tape shows and when I got home from work, I’d watch scenes with the characters I was interested in and fast-forwarded through the rest. Today, I’m happier to spend an hour on a rainy Saturday morning watching All My Children than I am to scurry around trying to find some time in my schedule to watch a half-hour every day. And, I’m less likely to find TWO hours on that same Saturday to catch up on four.

If PP is thinking that fans are watching BOTH All My Children and One Life to Live, then I think two things are important: (1) fan connections to both shows and (2) if subsequent weeks numbers show one show consistently outperforming the other or not.

An AMC Outlier
In spite of being a 20+ year viewer of All My Children, I’m an outlier. I was a diehard As The World Turns/Guiding Light viewer. All My Children was a fluke for me. It was the only then-ABC soap I watched and — with the sole exception of the Kyle Lewis/Oliver Fish storyline (which got botched big time) — nothing ever appealed to me about OLTL. Subsequently, when both shows returned online, I watched AMC and went on my merry way.

Bottom Line: Give PP some room to grow and to figure some stuff out. THIS IS ALL BRAND NEW. Let them play around with it without throwing in the damn towel on the first down and going home in a huff. Listen, they’ve just given you back Billy Clyde Tuggle, for the love of God, one of the greatest characters in the history of the genre. Quit bitching. Shut up. Be thankful. And watch.

Don’t make me have to rant at you again.

(P.S. — Has anyone ever bitched because you only get one episode of your favorite primetime network sitcom each week? And for 24-26 weeks per year, if you’re lucky? Hell, under this new paradigm, you’re still going to get more than 100 new episodes of each program each year. How is this still not a good thing???)

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You’re Out? You’re Off the Air: Networks Swinging the Big Gay Axe

the-new-normal-utah-new-home__oPt

NBC’s “The New Normal,” a gaycentric series the network chose not to renew.

Although most people associate the month of May with the Kentucky Derby, Memorial Day weekend traffic or beautiful spring bouquets for Mom, television has only one thing on its mind: Out with the old and in with the new. Manhattan is awash with TV folks in town for the upfronts, the annual ritual in which the networks present their fall schedules to advertisers in hopes of wooing big bucks. It is too early to tell which network will be the big winner, but this year there is a clear loser: gay characters.

via Derek Hartley: May-day! TV’s Big Gay Bloodbath. Huffington Post

w-and-s-dool

Will Horton (Chandler Massey) and Sonny Kiriakis (Freddie Smith) on “Days of our Lives,” one of the few gay couples on American television.

Sadly, Hartley tells it for the truth, but I’m not sure he actually goes far enough in his hue and cry against the broadcast networks.

Last year there was a lot of positive buzz about the numbers of gay characters on the networks. The sum total of gay characters was about 6% of all characters — lame — but it was the highest percentage ever. After wiping us off the map for all intents and purposes in primetime, in daytime it’s not much better. There seems only to be  Sonny and Will’s  front burner storyline on “Days of our Lives,” amongst the sordid lives being lived on the few remaining televised soaps. Other than that, gay characters on traditional American television are few and far between. (Eden Reigel’s Bianca stands alone — as a proud but lonely lesbian in the gay landscape of Pine Valley on the Web reboot of “All My Children.” It will be nice if that changes.)

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Van Hansis, Kit Williamson and John Halbach star in the superlative Web series “EastSiders,” created by Williamson and now available on logotv.com.

Moving away from traditional TV to find entertainment, I would encourage you to check out these great Web series: EastSiders, The Outs, Husbands, and others. If you go to Logo to check out EastSiders (highly recommended), explore some of their other Web only offerings, such as Hunting Season.

The New Normal — Done With TV

Last week, leading up to the upfronts — that’s the time when the networks pat themselves on their backs and announce their new series — news about television was all about what shows had gotten the axe.

Last season I watched a half dozen or so shows on the networks. Here’s what I enjoyed, in rank order:

the-new-normal-utah-new-home__oPt1. The New Normal
Ryan Murphy’s smartly written comedy about a gay couple who want to start a family. This show got some unfavorable reviews from gay outlets, but I found it simply lovely. Truth be told, this surprised me because I find Murphy’s Glee the most inconsistent show on TV. However, this one was a love note to the celebration of difference. Andrew Rannells and Justin Bartha were wonderful. NeNe Leakes was hilarious and I found the whole thing refreshing. I particularly liked the way Ellen Barkin’s strident conservative grandmother was allowed to change and still hold to her own truth. It was smart. Very smart. No, it was not everyone’s gay experience — we’re not all wealthy Californians with a perfect house and perfect teeth — and maybe you couldn’t quite relate to it, but hey, at least it WAS a gay experience on network television.

DAMON WAYANS JR., ELIZA COUPE, ADAM PALLY, CASEY WILSON, ELISHA CUTHBERT, ZACHARY KNIGHTON2. Happy Endings
The quirky, oddball non-linear new take on Friends full of fast dialogue and underplayed pop culture references to keep you on your toes. The show grew over its time on the air, but it never gelled the way I think it should have. I think Adam Pally was poised on the brink of being a breakout star, but no one seemed to know how to write for his character, which is a shame because I think there was a lot there to be mined. There’s talk that this may end up on some cable network or another. I hope so. It deserves a second time around. Zero bad apples in this gang of six.

New-Girl-Jess3. New Girl
Three guys and a girl share a loft apartment. Zany antics, deftly drawn characters and a healthy dose of heart. And this is on Fox? Zooey Deschanel and Jake Johnson have really shined this season. Max Greenfield is insanely funny and a fearless performer. The show is smart, has grounded itself in a unique worldview and is starting to emerge as more than “just a sitcom.” It’s a delight AND one of the few sitcoms that understands how to maximize its (terrific) guest stars. Two words: Julius Pepperwood.

Smash season 24. Smash
NBC’s paean to Broadway. Shot in New York and chock-a-block with actual theatre performers. Theresa Rebeck created the show, adapting Garson Kanin’s novel. A writer, Rebeck was also the showrunner and by all accounts the first season was a train wreck backstage and the novel show became nearly unwatchable at the end of season one. Brought back for a second season with a seasoned showrunner who severely retooled it, the storylines got tighter and more interesting to watch, but the network buried it and ratings fell through the floor. A shame, really, because there was some great stuff going on here. Andy Mientus, Jeremy Jordan and Megan Hilty showed great range, Christian Borle made the jump from stage acting to screen acting look utterly effortless and Debra Messing showed a fantastic grounded, dramatic side that we never got to see on Will & Grace.

images5. Whitney
An odd little nut of a show featuring interesting comedic performances from some not-so-stereotypical performers. Comedienne Whitney Cummings had her hand in two shows that debuted in 2011: her self-titled one and the CBS diner sitcom 2 Broke Girls. Whitney was a lovely little show with interesting performers while 2 Broke Girls was one extended dick joke. Guess which one is still on the air? Chris D’Elia and Rhea Seehorn were refreshing additions to the landscape.

AUBREY ANDERSON-EMMONS, RICO RODRIGUEZ, ED O'NEILL, SOFIA VERGARA, NOLAN GOULD, TY BURRELL, JULIE BOWEN, SARAH HYLAND, ARIEL WINTER, ERIC STONESTREET, JESSE TYLER FERGUSON6. Modern Family
Because it’s consistently funny when you least expect it to be. There’s a lot of talk about the over-the-top performers on this show — like Eric Stonestreet and Ty Burrell — but the real heart of this show is Ed O’Neill who delivers a consistent, grounded, underplayed performance week after week. He’s not recognized for this anti-Al Bundy turn, but he should. Critics who know better should realize that he’s the glue that’s holding the whole damn thing together. Every time I think that MF is close to jumping the shark, it pulls itself back from the edge. Also, as the children have grown, all of them have gotten better and better, particularly Nolan Gould, who plays Luke Dunphy.

Cougar TownAnd not on the network any longer:
Cougar Town
Courteney Cox leads Bill Lawrence’s band of wine-swilling crazies through an odd Florida town. Axed as an underperformer after two seasons on ABC, it’s found new life on TBS with two 13-episode seasons — one just concluded and one upcoming. If you understand Penny Can, Dime Eyes and Big Carl, you’re onto the shenanigans in the cul de sac. It’s devilishly clever in a truly oddball sort of way. It’s to group-of-friends comedies what Scrubs was to hospital comedies. Makes sense, because they were created by the same warped mind.

Last week, the networks axed numbers 1, 2, 4 and 5. So, I’m done with TV now. The cable company gets a call on Monday and the hundreds of channels with nothing on them but five-year-old reruns of Paula Deen deep-frying bacon-wrapped lard balls in butter and Housewives of (fill in a place) and Kardashians and hoarders and Honey Boo Boo and rednecks in swamps can all go away and I’ll save thousands of dollars over the next year and it will make me ecstatic not to have to pay that money to hellish Comcast!

Besides, most of the stuff that I watch comes from abroad. I watch A LOT of stuff from the U.K. on the computer. I watch a number of excellent independent Web series and even the back-from-the-dead All My Children. With the possible exception of losing out on new episodes of The Big Bang Theory and NCIS (because sometimes you just don’t want to have to think), why do I need cable if I have Hulu and Netflix and Amazon and YouTube and enough minor technical knowledge to sneak behind the occasional poorly built firewall?

And that’s my new normal.

Besides, NBC, any network that pays Matt Lauer millions of dollars to stay ON television certainly does not want me watching.

Pine Valley Is Open For Business Again

Pine Valley(4.29.13) — Today is Welcome Back to Pine Valley Day. (Or if your preference is just down the road, it’s Welcome Back to Llanview Day.) It’s the day that the Internet reboot of All My Children and One Life to Live begins.

It took me awhile, but I pinpointed my first viewing of AMC to the spring of 1982. I was a senior in high school and I had been, since before I even knew any better, a viewer of CBS soap operas — As The World Turns and Guiding Light, specifically. I couldn’t help it. That’s what my mother and my aunt and my grandmother watched. I couldn’t go anywhere, it seemed, during my childhood without having a CBS soap playing in the background.

That spring, a friend of mine called me on some holiday from school and demanded I turn on All My Children. (There was a lot of watching television while on the telephone in those days; just go with it.) She said that I had to watch this one crazy character because it reminded her of her mother. The actress was Dorothy Lyman, the role was Opal Gardner, and I thought it was hilarious. (And yes, Opal was a lot like her mother, as scary as that may be to contemplate.)

If Opal, Glamorama and all, got me to open the door, the rich, multi-generational tapestry of characters in Pine Valley invited me to the party and demanded that I pull up a chair.

The cast of the "new" All My Children includes many familiar faces, including original cast member Ray MacDonnell and longtime co-stars Cady McClain, Jill Larson, David Canary, Julia Barr and others. Image: Ferencomm/The Online Network.

The cast of the “new” All My Children includes many familiar faces, including original AMC cast member Ray MacDonnell and longtime co-stars Cady McClain, Jill Larson, David Canary, Julia Barr and others. Image: Ferencomm/The Online Network.

One of the creepiest characters in TV history, Billy Clyde Tuggle, assayed brilliantly by Matthew Cowles.

Creepy Billy Clyde Tuggle, assayed brilliantly by Matthew Cowles.

Watching AMC in those days was not just about watching the hot youngsters —Jenny and Greg and Angie and Jesse and Tad and Liza — it was also about watching Benny Sago spar with “The Duchess,” the one and only Phoebe Tyler, it was about the Charles/Mona/Phoebe triangle, it was about Langley and Phoebe and Myrtle and Opal, it was about hooker-with-a-heart-o’gold Donna Beck and Chuck Tyler, it was about Erica Kane and Tom Cudahy, Brooke English and Tom Cudahy, Palmer Cortlandt before Adam Chandler came to town, Nina and Cliff, Ellen and Mark, Joe and Ruth and Grandma Kate Martin, the best soap opera villain ever, Billy Clyde Tuggle. And “Bonkers.”

Great memories of stories well-told, but they are the stuff of television lore. They are the stuff of history as much as this iconic show opening:

When ABC announced the cancellation of AMC, I started to watch it again. I hadn’t watched much in the decade before the cancellation and I have it on pretty good authority that it was nothing like the Agnes Nixon-penned salad days of the 70s and 80s. The first thing I noticed was that Tad Martin had grey hair! Tad the Cad got old? What the hell? I just couldn’t get over that. I mentioned it to a friend and fellow viewer. He suggested that I should look in the mirror. Oh. According to the AMC bible, Tad and I are the same age. Dammit.

MEKnight14tad03Still, I can mourn my lost youth, I suppose, but, then again, I don’t actually want to see the same things I saw in 1983. I don’t want to watch the same stories again and again. I want to be excited about new stories and new ideas. Isn’t that really the point?

(And the other point is that Michael E. Knight and I both aged gracefully and we still look fabulous, grey hair and all!)

Anyhow, today is a new day in Pine Valley. Like Brigadoon, it’s risen again and is ready to let us in. Maybe some of your old favorites won’t be there. Maybe you’ll be looking for The Goalpost or the Valley Inn or the Glamorama. Maybe they won’t be there either. But just like in1970 at the first beginning, Joe Martin will be there (God bless Ray MacDonnell!!).

Dixie Cooney will be there. And Opal Cortlandt. And Jesse and Angie Hubbard. And Brooke English and Adam Chandler. And a whole lot of young people that you don’t know yet. And that shouldn’t scare you away. That should excite you. It’s a new day. In the world and in Pine Valley.

Oft-repeated through the years — and for awhile seen in the opening credits, I believe — is the poem from Agnes Nixon’s AMC bible:

The Great and the Least,
The Rich and the Poor,
The Weak and the Strong,
In Sickness and in Health,
In Joy and Sorry,
In Tragedy and Triumph,
You are All My Children.

Nixon’s All My Children has always been about just those things. Today, they begin telling new stories in a new medium with both familiar and new faces just like always. I have a feeling this day may mark the beginning of a new day of serialized storytelling in this country. That hope — that we can again tune in tomorrow — or at four a.m. or watch from our phone on the train on the way home from the office — makes this a very good day indeed.
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The incomparable Ruth Warrick.

The incomparable Ruth Warrick.

P.S. — I spent many years of my working life in the theatre. I don’t get star struck. I have met and worked with many famous personages, but my autograph collection is very, very small. The only person from a daytime drama I have ever deliberately sought out to meet and to sign an autograph was the late Ruth Warrick. I thought she was an absolutely brilliant actress and there have been very, very few characterizations ever that rose to the rarified level of Phoebe English Tyler Wallingford.

Would that the ‘Duchess’ could see Pine Valley reborn. I’m certain that she and the rest of the Daughters of Fine Lineage would be pleased!

Watch Now!

7 Reasons To Watch (or Rewatch) “The Outs”

7 Reasons To Watch (or Rewatch) “The Outs”. | BuzzFeed H/T Hunter Canning’s Facebook

Tommy Heleringer as Scruffy and Hunter Canning as Jack, two of the stars of the web series The Outs.

Tommy Heleringer as Scruffy and Hunter Canning as Jack, two of the stars of the web series The Outs.

The “Chanukah Special” is terrific. A great cap to the series. Beautifully done on every level.

The Final Pitch, the Last ‘Outs’

Hunter Canning and Tommy Heleringer on the set of The Outs. Image: The Outs Facebook page.

Hunter Canning and Tommy Heleringer on the set of The Outs. Image: The Outs Facebook page.

Today is the release day of the last episode of The Outs, the fantastic Web series chronicling the lives of young folks in Brooklyn. It’s achingly well-written and acted. It’s also so nice to see terrific stories about gay people where they are just part of the fabric of the landscape and not “quota fiction.” You know: Insert funny gay friend here.

WARNING: THE OUTS WILL HOOK YOU. YOU WILL WANT TO START AT THE BEGINNING AND WATCH THEM ALL. SEVERAL TIMES.

I’m just sayin.’

I’ve been riffing lately on the emerging importance of the Web in storytelling on scales both large and small. We are just at the beginning of trying to figure out how to do it, how to sustain it, how to fund it, and how to build an audience. The Outs and creators Adam Goldman and Sasha Winters have, perhaps inadvertently, become one of the standards in this new world that we can look to and learn from. O, pioneers!

Take it good one.

P.S. — I’m on the road this week and no time to sit down and watch the final episode, “Over It,” so, don’t ruin it for me!

More:
The Outs homepage, Facebook
Me on The Outs here and here and here

Take It Good One — One Last Time

Last episode of one of my favorite Web series, The Outs, will be released on April 1. The trailer is below. You should watch all of the episodes. No, seriously, watch The Outs!

H/T The Outs Facebook

Mark’s picks for other Web series worth watching:

A+ storytelling and fine acting. Proud to have contributed to their Kickstarter.

husbands

Frothy fabulousness. Super guest stars and production values.

grey

Learn fun things with Grey. Terrific fun.

chalk

I love this series of grammar videos. Great marketing idea, this. Addictive.